I'm not the only one! There have been discussions on venues in the Buffalo-Niagara-Rochester (WNY) for out-of-town brides on different discussion-boards. The most recent one I found is on yelp.com, a user-review website.
I figure the venue search is going to take the longest time to figure out. Luckily, I have plenty of time to visit sites as I (a) am not getting married anytime soon, and (b) visit Buffalo on a semi-regular basis. I'm currently in the "making a list of all possible places" stage.
Unfortunately, it seems that many wedding websites only list those venues and vendors that pay to be placed on the list. Therefore it can be hard to get a complete list of locals: something I wish to remedy.
I also found another Buffalo reception venue discussion on city-data.com.
There was also a lively discussion on Buffalo Rising.